is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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