doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
