My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He shit in the fireplace
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