And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
