Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
