More tranny stories later!
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
