Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
