It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
