go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Randomize
