You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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