Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
