i just had sex bonerless
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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