They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
It's blow job season.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Randomize
