thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
