last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
