i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize