I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
