I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize
