Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
