i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Randomize