Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
