It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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