Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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