I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I can't turn off my feet"
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
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