i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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