I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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