Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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