Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
