So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
