That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize
