first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
My vagina is officially offended.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
