Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
