You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
