So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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