How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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