Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
This toilet bowl is my home.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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