that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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