idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
