So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
How external is "for external use only"?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
