I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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