don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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