No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
