I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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