Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
