My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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