You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
North Korea, Best Korea!
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
