remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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