ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
And then he peed in my hair
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