i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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