It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
